a blog post in which i show off my mad skills

and by show off i'm talking croissants. more specifically, pain au chocolat. ah, we must credit the french for making food sound so dreamy. i'll preface this recipe by saying croissants require butter. loooots of butter and for that they make no apologies. but, when you put so much effort into making something, surely you've earned it.

stonehenge-o-butter

also, i'm hardly advising that you actually make these. i do like to be considered the awesome baker amongst my friends. and if word gets out that croissants really can be made by anyone... well my awesome baker status might falter a bit. so... you should probably just watch, okay?


brace your arteries ladies. these are not for the faint of heart. (and i mean that literally)

chocolate croissants or pain au chocolat
yield: 12 croissants
source: cooksillustrated.com


dough
15 oz (about 3 cups) ap flour, plus more for dusting
1 tablespoon instant yeast
1/4 c sugar
1 1/4 teaspoon salt
1 1/4 c whole milk, cold
2 tablespoons unsalted butter, cut into 1/2-inch pieces


butter square
24 tablespoons cold unsalted butter, cut into 24 pieces
2 tablespoons flour


chocolate filling
8 oz semisweet chocolate, chopped fine
or 12 or 24 sticks of chocolate (1-2 sticks per croissant)


egg wash
1 large egg, lightly beaten with a splash of water


begin with the dough. mix the flour, yeast, sugar and salt together in your stand mixer. add the milk and mix on low speed, increasing to medium. once the flour and milk is mostly incorporated, add the butter one piece at a time. knead the dough by machine until it is smooth. the dough should be slightly sticky. turn the dough out onto the counter top and form it into a ball. wrap with plastic wrap and refrigerate for 1 hour.

time to make the butter square. begin with your chilled butter, cut into 24 pieces. mash the butter with a metal scraper.

when you get tired of doing that just go in with your hands to finish it off. dust the butter with flour and continue mashing until it is all incorporated.

form the butter into a 7" x 7" square and wrap it in plastic wrap or parchment and stash it in the fridge for at least 30 minutes.

after the dough has refrigerated for 1 hour, roll it out on a lightly floured counter until it is an 11" x 11" square. yes, the measurements matter. once you have done this pull out your butter square and and place it on the dough as seen below.

pull up the corners and firmly pinch the dough together. make sure it is securely sealed then begin rolling it out.

take your rolling pin and tap the dough from the middle out to the edges. this will get the butter to soften so you can roll it out evenly. the key here is to keep an even layer of butter within the dough being careful not to break through the butter. once the butter has softened slightly begin rolling the dough into a square 14" x 14". check the dough often to make sure it isn't sticking to the counter.

once you have reached 14" x 14" make your first turn by folding the dough into thirds. (like a letter. you know, before email...)

then in thirds again for the second turn. immediately wrap it in plastic and stash in the fridge for 2 hours.

after 2 hours roll out the dough again to 14" x 14" and repeat the turns as before, for a total of 4 turns. wrap it and refrigerate it for at least 2 hours. since i like my croissants in the morning and not as a nighttime snack, i leave it overnight and finish it off the next day.


once the dough is properly chilled dust your counter top and gently roll the dough out to a 20"x 20" square. an overnight chill does have the disadvantage of having extra time for gluten development making the dough a little harder to roll out. it's okay to start rolling then walk away for a few minutes to let the dough relax. do make sure the dough stays cold. any melting of the butter and the whole thing might as well go in the trash. not kidding. if you feel the dough is getting too warm cover it and throw it back in the fridge for 15 minutes.

so once you have your square, use a pizza cutter to divide it into fourths, then cut each into thirds so you have 12 pieces total.

now for the chocolate! this is where the sticks of chocolate come in handy. lay one or two toward one end of the piece of dough and roll it up. if you don't have the sticks, just use about 1 heaping tablespoon of chopped chocolate and carefully roll it up.

place the rolled dough onto two parchment lined baking sheets seam side down. cover loosely with plastic wrap and let them rise at room temperature until puffy, 45-60 minutes.

yes, there are two regular croissants... i'll explain in a bit.

in the meantime, heat the oven to 400 degrees adjusting the racks to the upper and lower middle positions. when the dough is done rising, use a pastry brush and brush them with the egg wash.

bake for 20-22 minutes or until they are a nice deep golden brown, rotating the baking sheets from top to bottom halfway through.


cool the croissants on a baking rack for at least 20 minutes. serve warm or at room temperature.

now, let's say perhaps you ate a few of the chocolate sticks before making the croissants and perhaps you were two croissants worth of chocolate short... no worries, just form them into a traditional croissant shape. i took that fourth quadrant of dough and cut off one third then made a diagonal cut to form the last two thirds into triangle shapes. then starting at the wide end, roll it up and let it join the others for the final rise and baking.

so, what to do with the odd regular croissant? make an egg sandwich, of course. with cheese. yup, that's american cheese on there and i am not ashamed. i'm only sad i didn't have any bacon or sausage to add.

you're better off not counting the calories in this picture

pain au chocolate— delish? yes. impressive? yes. difficult? NO! yes, very. so, don't run off and try to make these, you just may end up with amazing praise-worthy pastries something awful and disappointing.


you've been warned.


*photos mostly by my awesome lil' sis, monica who happened to be in town for a visit.

magic chocolate ice cream

really. it is magic.


we used to have an ice cream maker and i dutifully pulled it out every summer to churn out some of the homemade stuff. it was always good and usually eaten in a day. then about two years ago i discovered the canister had sprung a leak. it was one of those freeze the canister for 24 hours then churn type of machines. of course we could buy a replacement canister... just haven't gotten around to it. since then i've always wondered if i could cheat and make ice cream without the ice cream maker. maybe just whip up some heavy cream and fold it into a custard or some other base and just freeze it as is. i always wondered...


then. then i picked up the "summer entertaining" special from cooks illustrated and what do you know, but those geniuses came up with a recipe for no ice cream maker ice cream. what? how did they know?! can it really be that creamy? can it?! i doubted. but i had to try it out and let me tell you, those folks just don't disappoint. 


instead of using a custard based ice cream, this recipe combines sweetened condensed milk and melted chocolate then whipped cream folded into the mix. then freeze. that's it! here's how it goes together:


1 tsp instant coffee or espresso powder
1 T hot water
4 oz bittersweet chocolate, chopped fine
1/2 c sweetened condensed milk
1/2 t vanilla extract
pinch salt
1 1/4 c cold heavy cream

first, combine the instant coffee or espresso powder and hot water. or, if you're like me and hate to run out and buy just one thing i probably won't have much use for, combine 1 T ground coffee with 1 T hot milk. let dissolve (or steep) for 5 mins. i'm sure the espresso powder is better, so you should probably do that. or not. i won't tell.

combine the chocolate and sweetened condensed milk and espresso (or strained milk coffee) and microwave until melted, stirring every 10 seconds..

stir in vanilla and salt.

while that cools, whip the cream to soft peaks.

in a large bowl, whisk together chocolate mixture and 1/3 of the whipped cream until combined.

then gently fold in the remaining whipped cream.

pour into a freezer-safe container and freeze for 6 hours.

ack! 6 hours?! it'll be worth it, i promise! to hold you over, lick the bowl clean. i won't judge. once those 6 long excruciating hours have passed... scoop and swoon... 

it doesn't hurt to have a warm chocolate chip cookie on hand.